Cat Behavior: Don't take it personally!

By Daniel Quagliozzi

As a person who works not only with cats but also with their guardians, I often find myself counselling far beyond the scope of cat behavior. Human emotion is a huge factor in the way people perceive their cats actions. Can you blame us? We humans are so vested in each others feelings that it is very easy to equate the same perception to the way our cats view the world.

Did kitty suddenly pee on my pillow because he's mad at me? "My cat purposely knocks my hair brush into the toilet because he thinks I'm ignoring him and he knows how particular I am about my hair". "I was just sitting there minding my own business and my cat snuck up on me and bit my ankle! He HATES ME!!"

Believe it or not, cats care very little about how you feel, what you like, which shirt is your favorite and who you are dating. In fact, cats are quite selfish creatures. They almost always do things that are completely self serving. Ever find yourself getting up at 6 am to fill a food bowl or sitting on the edge of the couch where its less ideal because your cat prefers the middle? Cats are manipulators plain and simple and when they do things a little out of the ordinary (by human standards) they are not trying to hurt your feelings. They are however... trying to tell you that some things have to change!

Ok...perfect example: The cat who peed on your pillow. Chances are there is something about that litterbox that your cat is unhappy with. Did you forget to clean it, change the litter suddenly, add more cats to your home, go on a long vacation, have a mobile toddler running amok in the apartment? A sudden poop mishap or wayward pee points to stress, change or something new that may be triggering it. Why my boyfriends pillow? He must not approve of the guys I'm dating! No, chances are the box was such a turn off that a soft pillow was very inviting. Once the habit forms, the pillow becomes part of the regiment. Focus on what may be triggering the behavior and make things simpler.

The constant conversationalist: "Whenever I'm on the phone, my cat won't stop meowing? He must want me to get off the phone." I highly doubt that your cat knows what a phone is. Maybe he thinks you're talking to him? Usually when you talk to him, he is rewarded in some way. A treat, petting session, maybe even some playtime, will usually follow a human-cat conversation. Talking on the phone is such a tease!

The over the counter-knocker-over: Cats get bored! Could it be that your cat is knocking your pencils off the counter each day because you're not engaging her in long enough play sessions? Does she wake you up at night by making noise? Do you get up, yell or turn on a light? Guess what? You just rewarded your cat! Even responses we think are negative can be perceived as positive from a cats point of view.

The "Out of the Blue" attack: Sudden aggression without stress as a trigger almost always points to deprivation. Some cats need constant stimuli, plain and simple. Sure, most cats sleep all day and sleep even more at night. Other cats will count on you to provide them with entertainment, no matter how long your work day was or how little sleep you got because he was standing on your head all night. A sudden bite on the leg is an extreme cry for attention. PAY ATTENTION TO ME! Dancing With the Stars can wait!

Bite the bullet folks. You may have been at school for nine hours feeding your brain, but kitty was home with nothing to do all day. When you walk in the door, it's GO TIME! Get those toys out and get your cat engaged in play.


So, you see... it's not all your fault...but really it is. Don't take it personally. Just remember whose house you live in and who your boss really is and you will do just fine.

I Love You, But Please Be Quiet!

Though cats communicate mostly by body language, some cats “talk” more than others. This is could be genetic (some breeds, such as the Siamese, are especially prone to this) and partly a learned behavior. It's even been said that cats have a Manipulative Meow!

Your cat may have learned that if she meows, people will talk to her, play with her, feed her, or even yell at her (trust me, I know this first hand). Remember for some cats negative attention is better than none at all. Some owners love to “talk” with their cats, back and forth, so if you have adopted your cat as an adult, it is possible that this behavior was encouraged by a prior owner. If you have brought Kitty up, then most likely you can think of things that have “rewarded” this behavior. Cats learn to communicate with us, just as we learn to communicate with them. Maybe when the litterbox is dirty, your cat draws your attention to it by walking around and meowing, and so you clean the box. This is how behavior patterns start.

Cats also meow to express discomfort or pain, agitation, and in some cases, territoriality. Unneutered (intact) male cats may yowl in conjunction with sexual behavior, and female cats in heat may meow excessively as well.

If you have a chatty cat, how can you stop or at least curb this habit?

Do Not Reward

This should be the backbone of your behavior modification plan. Pay attention to your kitty when she is being quiet, wait for a moment of silence before you feed her. Ignore her when she meows. If you are having trouble sleeping at night, you can try earplugs, or pulling the cover up over you head! Or you could close the door to your bedroom. Remember that if you break down and give your kitty attention, you will have to start all over again. For more information on how to prevent nighttime or early a.m. wakings, please ask for our handout on nocturnal kitties.

Make Sure Your Cat’s Needs Are Met!

Cats need attention and interaction, so make sure that somewhere in your daily schedule you allot times for play and petting. Cats like routine and will meow excessively if their routine is upset, so do try to do everything, especially if it’s cat related such as feeding and changing the litterbox, on a set schedule as much as you are able. Provide your cat with stimulation. Keeping your cats indoors is much safer, but they will need to be entertained and encouraged to exercise. Even indoor-outdoor cats need owner interaction and stimulation. New toys, bought or made, food cubes that make Kitty work to get her food, and the occasional catnip toy help keep her from getting bored. Interactive playtime is the best kind of playtime for cats- toys like fishing-pole toys that your cat can chase could be integrated into a daily routine. Make sure your cat has a clean litterbox, and fresh water at all times. Make sure her diet is adequate. .

Be Patient!

It takes time for cats to learn behaviors, and often takes even more time to unlearn them. In order to make a change in your cat’s meowing, you need to be very consistent and give your cat time to adjust.

Recognize When A Behavior Is Not Likely To Change:

You may be able to reduce the amount of attention-getting meowing or feeding-time meowing by ignoring, and feeding and playing at set times, but this will not cure a hard-core talker such as some Siamese or Siamese mix breeds are. These behaviors are characteristic of some breeds, and are not likely to go away in their entirety.


THESE SITUATIONS REQUIRE A DIFFERENT RESPONSE

If Your Cat Is Grieving:

If your cat has recently lost a companion, feline or human or even canine, he may walk around the house and meow, perhaps in search of them or just reacting to the change. While you don’t want to reward the meowing, it is important to give your cat extra reassurance in these cases, spending quality time, preferably on a schedule, until he adjusts to his loss.

If You Have Just Moved To A New Home, Or Have Just Brought A Cat Into Your Home:

It is normal, especially for an adult cat, to be disoriented and unsure in a new environment. Introducing your cat to the house gradually may help prevent some agitation (see our handout on introducing a cat to a new home.) Again, don’t reward the meowing, but be a little understanding in these instances. This behavior usually takes a few weeks to wind down.

If Your Normally Quiet Cat Has Become Very Vocal:

Make sure there is nothing medically wrong with her; schedule a check-up with your vet. Pay attention to environmental changes to see if something could be bothering her, such as a new stray cat coming by your back door.